Spring

Today marks the first day of Spring! Yay!!! Welcome Spring! I wanted to have a party to celebrate but David spent much of last night in the bathroom on the seat of the throne, so I'm not sure how much partying we'll be doing. If he is up to it later on, I'd like for all of us to go 0n another hike and enjoy the weather. It looks like we'll be either rainy or snowy, or both, over the next few days so we'd better get out while we can.

I had hoped to make some fun Spring treats but didn't get around to it. Maybe I can find some fun Spring activities for us to do. The web is a good place for that!

Well, I hope you all have a good first day of Spring!! I'm hoping that we'll be outside enjoying the day soon!

Pics of Chickies Rock County Park

Click on the picture to view it larger! Enjoy!

Hello Friday!

With a beautiful day in store, the kids and I are heading out to Chickies Rock County Park. It boasts beautiful vistas and water scenes. We've never been there before but it looks like an easy 40 minute drive from us. I'll try to post pictures later. Well, I'm off to pack some lunches and snacks and get everyone geared up for a day of sunshine, fresh air, and hiking trails! Wonder how many ticks we'll bring home? Oh, here's a link to the website for anyone who wants to see some pics ahead of time! Enjoy! http://www.co.lancaster.pa.us/parks/cwp/view.asp?a=676&q=518276

FB

When I first signed up for FB, I was very excited to befriend old schoolmates, connect with family, and stay in touch with friends of various circles. It was very nice to be able to send photos to Granny in SC and to share albums of the kids with other people in such an easy way.

But, over time, I started to have problems with FB. Well, not really FB, but more so with my own thoughts and perceptions. It didn't take long before I'd see statuses by friends and start thinking and comparing them to my own life situations.

I'd see someone on vacation somewhere and think, "oh, it must be nice to go away and not have to worry about the cost." I'd see someone flirting with their husband online (in a modest manner) and think, "oh, I wish Eddie had FB so he could say cute things like that to me." Or, I'd see that people went away for the day as a group and think, "it must be nice to be able to hang out with a group and laugh and live life together." Do you notice a trend? Every time someone was happy about something in their life, I was beginning to turn it into something to be jealous of. So, instead of being excited for a vacationer, I'd be annoyed. Instead of being happy that a couple remembers to make time for one another, I'd feel like my own relationship wasn't where it should be. Instead of being excited for people who got out and had fun with others and asking to see pics or hear funny stories about their adventures, I'd begin to seethe and wonder what was wrong with me that I didn't get invited, too.

Simply put, I've entered into a battle with myself. It's a battle of self worth, jealousy, and contentment. It's probably always been there but FB shone the light on it. So, now I need to put my focus back to where it belongs and that starts with remembering who God says I am and looking to Him to fill my voids....not FB.

So, for those of you wondering why my sudden departure from FB, that's why. It's ugly. It's immature. It's also the truth of the matter. Someday, hopefully, I'll be able to rejoice when others rejoice and to stand in the mirror and see a person wonderfully made by God but right now, I struggle with it so FB is not the place for me. Hopefully, others reading this do not struggle as much as me with this and are able to view FB for what it is... a social interaction tool. Not a measuring stick.

I'm not exactly sure what I want to say here. So, I guess I will just speak from the heart, or head, as the case may be.

This Summer has been a growing Summer. I am slowly learning (and, I might as well add, AGAIN here) that there are always things in life that you cannot control, there are those things which you can control (whether or not you choose to is another topic), and those circumstances that make your problems seem like child's play.

I've had my share of times when I am looking into my situation and shaking my head but then I hear of something far worse and I'm ashamed at my attitude and humbled by how little I've been given to really dread and bemoan. I guess what I am saying is that if a person could be inside my brain for long enough, they'd probably walk away saying "what a spoiled little brat" and how I sound so similar to a whining toddler.

We have all heard the phrase, "there will always be somebody better than you at something and somebody worse than you." I don't care so much about that any more. Now, my lesson has changed more to, "there is always someone with more of a burden than you and someone with less of a burden."

What do I do with that information? Do I let it change my attitude from one of self introspection to one of outward empathy? Right now, I'm trying to quiet all the times I've been thinking about how terrible this or that is in my own life and I'm trying to focus on what my friends may be going through. And not just focus on them, but pray for them and when possible, help in practical ways...and I am far far from perfect in these areas! A dear friend (one I am not "close" to...but remember fondly) is in the final breathes of his life. He's not much older than me. 35 I think. He'll be leaving behind a wife (whom, I haven't met, but I've heard she is an amazing, strong woman of God), and 4 young boys. I can't even begin to imagine what that must be like. I am so glad that they have a group of friends and family around them to support them and to minister to them. People who are giving up their time to help. People who are there no matter what. And, I guess, what I'm saying is, that I hope I can be like that someday. Someone who can put aside their own junk to help other people walk through theirs. Lately, I don't think I would be able to do that b/c I'm so busy trying to fix the things in my own world, that I really don't even have any control over in the first place, that I would probably miss what others around me are going through.

So, I'm learning to wake up to what is around me. I'm learning to cherish the people in my life, because you really don't know from one day to another what life will bring your way. There's more that I could say but I think I have given myself enough to think over for one day.

Summer

Signs that Summer is near:

1. The kids are more distracted than usual during their homework time.
2. Suppertime has been bumped from 5:30 to 7:30p.m.
3. Children are awake past 8:00 p.m.
4. Lightening Bugs have seen a decline in life expectancy due to over zealous little fingers.
5. It's hot outside past 7pm
6. It's hot outside by 9 a.m.
7. The flowers are flowering, and so are the weeds.
8. You see some of your neighbors for the first time since Winter set in.
9. There seem to be extra children in your yard and extra noise but that's OK b/c at least that means they are outside.
10. Taking a bath before bed sometimes means just washing muddy, grass stained feet and dirt encrusted hands and watermelon stained smiles and chins.
11. It rains and there's thunder and lightening along with it.
12. It is warm enough to be in the rain in a swimsuit (or tee shirt and shorts)
13. The pool water might be 64 degrees but it doesn't matter b/c you've been out in the 90 degree weather playing in the garden and the children were out playing tag.
14. There are numerous movie days and field trips at school.
15. The book bags are emptier than normal of homework and fuller than normal of finished art work and crafts.
16. You've been making smores over the fire pit and not in the microwave.
17. The band aid supply is dwindling b/c that stunt on the bike w/the mulch pile ALMOST worked and the belly flop onto the swing w/a wet bathing suit just didn't quite take.
18. You found a football in the top of the grape vines
19. The circus has come to town.
20. The Fair has come to town, too.
21. Instead of normal street traffic, there's the increasingly common sound of mowers, edgers, chainsaws, weed eaters, and ice cream trucks.
22. It's 9:00p.m and the kids are still awake and you just don't care.

It's been quite a long time since I've written anything in here. There have been a few times when I thought I might write a new entry but then decided it would just be a bunch of complaining so I decided not to bother.

Not a whole lot has happened since November. We've had our ups and downs but nothing out of the ordinary....at least OUR ordinary.

The kids are wrapping up another school year. I'm very ready to be done with it. There's been a lot of turmoil this year with one thing and another and I'm ready to put it behind us for good. It's hard to believe though that come next year, Michaela will be entering her last year of elementary school. Time goes so fast. David will be a 2nd grader and little Amanda will be in 1st. It shouldn't be too much of a change for her since she did all day K this year. She'll be familiar w/the cafeteria already and the longer school day. I thought about homeschooling next year to avoid some of the crap from this year but I'm not sure about that yet. I haven't even talked it over w/Eddie at all. That's not so unusual though, we see so little of each other. Sometimes I wish he were on FB so we can stay in touch easier. How sad is that?

Anyway, I'm looking forward to Summer so much. I need that time w/the family. Eddie will be on another 10 wk shut down starting June 24 or so and I'll just be working pt at Weavers so we'll have time to reconnect as a family. I'm not sure what all we'll end up doing but it will just be nice to be together and not have any time constraints on us (bedtime, homework, etc). I'm also looking forward to reconnecting w/a lot of other friends and family. There have been so many ppl that we haven't been in touch with b/c of our crazy schedules. I'm looking forward to investing ourselves back into the lives of other people.

Well, my head is throbbing so I'm gonna take a nap I think. I have a lot more to say but I'm not sure how much of it I should say. Does that make sense? Life is a battle and I'm feeling a little beat up so I probably should just keep quiet for now.

Until next time.....